|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
The Economics of True Love
In the real world, can there be romance without finance? A common saying: No romance, without finance. But what does it mean really? After a little thought about it and a hard look at the big picture, we see that it actually derives from the fact that in the real world, there is actually some level of bias to any decision we make, including our decision to love or be in love. In a land of utopia therefore, it would seem perfectly reasonable that Love would know no bounds, experience no biases. In our world however, far from any kind of utopia, biases begin to play their different roles, one way or the other. From a financial standpoint, most women want to be secure and go with whoever comes correct as far as finances are concerned. But finances aren't the only bias in our society: upbringing, level of education, manners, carriage, height, persona, charm, etiquette, to name a few. Plus of course, he or she should be generally approved by our loved ones. Expression of our individual biases however, does not mean we are mean people, or self-seeking individuals. On the contrary, they point immediately to two main glaring things: that we are merely humans in an imperfect world and our very human nature, with its whims and elements of choice and free will, allow us to "filter" out our choices till we arrive at our 'true love'. But is this love so defined, pure and divine or is it just a load of baloney anyway? Yes it can be pure and divine; no, it is not a lot of baloney. Why? Because from our very natures and the nature of the world in which we live in, our whims must be tolerated, till we see Prince Charming or the Fair Maiden, whoever they turn out to be. True Love found in this manner, mustn't be confused with "love" that stems from a desire for self-gain and greed. Yes, it is perfectly possible that finance may drive a romance. And yes, it is perfectly possible that for the less-materialistic of us, finance does drive a romance, but to a much lesser degree than may be considered healthy by most average standards. A lust for self-gain and the romantic attachments that derive from this may only be considered greedy and disgusting (relative terms, mind), if the romance that results is only for the material possessions and nothing else. A financially-motivated romantic relationship then, in this guise may not be true love at all, but just the love of self and the desire for self-gain. At the same time, whilst most 'decent' folk may not have a no-holds-barred attitude toward the 'present' material/financial status of the one they admire, everyone wants to see that the loved one has some "prospects", or some desire and motivation to make something of him or herself in life. No one wants to be in love with the future bum. In this regard, because of the basic instinct of survival which is perhaps the greatest instinct of all living creatures, humans included, True Love may be assumed. In this last context however, true love can only be assumed, after it has been tested, not to be a play for the gold, but as a really genuine state of the mind. This brings us quickly to the story of Romeo and Juliet. First and foremost, they were both from two powerful, perhaps financially free, albeit feuding families. Without the knowledge (possible bias) that Romeo was of the Montague family, she is drawn by him. When she later finds out, she mourns her fate to the heavens and Romeo, hiding in bushes close to her house, hears her lamentation and despite being initially dismayed that she was a Capulet, (this dismay cannot have been too great however, otherwise what was Romeo doing lurking around Juliet's house in the first place?) is immediately emboldened to make his feelings known to her. True Love had been found! What is the moral of the story therefore in the light of the theme of my discourse? True love can be found, despite any and all biases, financial included. He or she may not be well-off now, but that can always change. Romeo and Juliet were not willing to risk their love over pride and the squabble of some old and dead people; a squabble which was probably silly, of which they knew nothing. Yes, the need for security is very high, but if you truly love him or her, if the bias can be changed, you will try to change it and have true love. If it can't be changed, or the other refuses to change to suit your personal 'filter' and make you both happy, then, you may have to let go. Knowledge is not power?it is only empowering; the Application of Knowledge is Power. About The Author Christopher Adeyemi Adetosoye is author of A Man's Guide to Finding True Love and A Woman's Guide to Finding True Love, E-books, which are currently available at http://www.trueloveguide.com; adeyemi@trueloveguide.com
MORE RESOURCES:
Google News |
|
|
|
RELATED ARTICLES
When A Relationship Goes Bad What do you do when a long term relationship goes bad? How do you pick up the pieces and get on with your life? It is very simple for someone to tell you that you should just forget about the person you once loved and find someone new.You don't want to stop rehashing in your mind the how and why the relationship went bad. The Path of Relationship Each month after completing and fine tuning Letters on Life I'm excited about sending it out. Within a few hours I start to wonder about the next letter and whether people will like it. Am I Doing the Right Thing? Dear Candace,My fianc and I just broke up, and I need to know if this was the right thing to do or not. I love him more than anything else in the whole world. Warning Signs He / She May Not Be The One We've all looked back on past relationships and said, "What was I thinking". Problem is, you weren't thinking. Squashing the Gay Relationship Killer Known As Jealousy IntroductionYou might feel it when that hot stud across the room at the gym gives your lover "the look-over." You might experience it if your ex-boyfriends ever cheated on you and then you project it onto your current man. The Revenge Affair: Characteristics of the Adulterer "I Want to Get Back at Him/Her" is one of 6 kinds of affairs I outline in my E-book.This is the "revenge affair. What You Should Know About Domestic Abuse What is domestic abuse?There are many forms of domestic abuse, ranging from screaming threats to pushing and shoving. Contrary to what many women think, abuse isn't just physical battering. Put Some Z.I.P. Into Your Relationships Relationships are really what makes the world go 'round, aren't they? Imean, good, positive, healthy and meaningful relationships provide us withthe richest experiences we have here on this old earth of ours. Your lovingspouse who shares everything with you; that best friend who connects withyou like few others do; the people at work who appreciate you and help youto become the best that you can be; This is what brings joy to life!But. Women and Men: Never The Twain Shall Meet "Dear Happy Guy,"I just don't understand men. Last night I was sitting at the kitchen table, when my husband wandered by with a glass in his hand. Assuming Personal Responsibility in Relationships Stephen Covey in 7 Habits of Highly Effective Families says that responsibility is really the " ability to choose our response." We don't have to respond to stimuli and triggers the same way we have always done. Five Tips for Breaking Free of The Drama Habit and Developing a Healthier Arguing Style We all feel angry from time to time, but feeling angry and acting like a raging, out-of-control child during moments of anger are two very different things. And when anger "crosses the line" in the context of an intimate relationship, it can cause extensive-and sometimes even irreparable-discord and damage. An Introduction to Relationships "Love makes the world go around" was true when it was first uttered many years ago and remains just as true today. Love is what everybody is after. Looking for a Lasting, Deeply Satisfying Relationship? "Life has taught us that love does not consist in gazing at each other, but in looking outward together in the same direction."~Antoine de Saint-Exupery, 1900-1944, French Aviator and WriterIf you are looking for a lasting, deeply satisfying relationship, you might want to consider Antoine's definition of love. Infidelity: Difference Between a Rage and Revenge Affair The fifth affair I outline in my book, "Break Free From The Affair" is called: "I Want to Get Back at Him/Her." This is the revenge affair. Easy Ways to Turn Any Evening Romantic If you don't have the time, money or energy to plan and execute the perfect date, you're not alone. The good news is you can set up a romantic evening in just a few minutes and without any cost. How To Write a Romantic Love Letter Does the thought of writing a love letter or poem automatically reduce your vocabulary to a 5-year-old's level? Well, believe it or not, that's a great place to begin!Kids speak straight from the heart. They don't worry about tripping over the right words, they only know how to say what they want using the most simple language. A Heat-scar Named Desire Where on earth is my "play on words" taking me with this one?I remember so well those taunting words."They told me to take a streetcar named Desire and then transfer to one called Cemeteries and ride six blocks and get off at Elysian Fields. Relationship Advice: Warning Signs of an Emotional Affair "But we're just friends" are four of the most dangerous words for your marriage.But over and over in my office and on the phone I hear it: "We are just friends, there is nothing going on. Do Men Just Want Mommy? Accomplished women are losers in romance claims NY Times columnist Maureen Dowd in her column titled "Men Just Want Mommy." She says powerful men want to marry women who are caretakers like secretaries, assistants, nannies, flight attendants, etc. Relationship Tips to Grow Close and Stay Close Relationship Tip 1My family loves movies. In the theater, on DVD and VCR at home, and now even in the van.
|
 |
 |
||||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
|
|
|||||
| Pendle Writers .com © 2006 | |||||
