|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
The Official Parenting Cheesecake Recipe
Whoever writes all those fancy cookbooks has never been a parent. To begin with, the pages are never spill-proof, almost guaranteeing that somewhere in the middle of mixing ingredients, a spill will cover the remaining two ingredients listed. This means that parents must learn to improvise. Some would suggest that the very thrill of cooking is experimentation. So what's the big difference between oregano and cayenne pepper, anyway? Then there are all those "quick" recipes to "serve your family" gracing the pages of women's magazines. NO recipe is quick with Little Helper's assistance. For the benefit of parents everywhere, I have taken my favorite cheesecake recipe and translated it into parentease. The non-parent version is available in Cooking By The Book -- a free bonus I offer with every purchase of The Get Happy Workbook at http://thehappyguy.com/happiness-workbook.html . Harvest Pumpkin Pie Cheesecake (Parent Version) Mix one cup of ginger snap cookie crumbs and one tablespoon of olive oil. Add more cookie crumbs to make up for the ones that disappeared about the same time your Little Helper walked into the kitchen. Press the crumby oil mixture ... "Sorry, Little Helper distracted me." Press the oily crumb mixture into the bottom of a 9-inch spring-form pan, and up around the edges about one inch. Put it in the refrigerator to cool - best to slip it in safely behind the broccoli and that thing that's been turning blue for three weeks in case Little Helper gets inspired Soften three bricks of cream cheese, ideally in the microwave. If you can't separate the cheese from Little Helper's hands, let her keep doing what she's doing until the cheese is good and soft. Cream the cheese with one and a half cups of pureed pumpkin, three large eggs, two tablespoons of cream, and one cup of brown sugar. Keep mixing until creamy. Add one teaspoon of vanilla extract. If you are fortunate enough to have help at this stage, you have three options: You will also need to add a tablespoon of cinnamon. If Little Helper is in a generous mood, don't worry. You still have three options: There is also a tablespoon of ground ginger to add. Sorry about that. Don't worry, you still have three options...again: I almost hate to mention this, but you'll need to add a teaspoon of ground nutmeg. And a half teaspoon of salt. And a half teaspoon of allspice. Go ahead and bang your head some more if it makes you feel better. Fortunately, there is a parental failsafe. It is sort of like a "get out of jail free card". Look in the bowl. Observe the quantity of creamy things. Observe the quantity of spicy things. If the quantity of creamy things is even slightly greater than the quantity of spicy things, keep going and pretend you didn't have any help. Maybe nobody will notice. If the quantity of spicy things is greater than the quantity of creamy things, open another can of pureed pumpkin. Keep adding cans of pureed pumpkin until creamy things are greater than spicy things -- or until your grocer runs out of cans. Pour the filling into the crust. Note, if you had to add too many cans of pureed pumpkin, this could get messy. I recommend hip-waders...especially for Little Helper. Cook at 350 degrees Fahrenheit for about 50 minutes or until the top is slightly brown and almost as cracked as your head and the counter. Do NOT let Little Helper eat the cake while it is still in the oven. Let it air cool in a safe place -- like at a neighbor's house -- then refrigerate overnight Just before serving, top with whipped cream and sprinkle with pecans. Oops. I just wrote that last line in non-parentease. It should read: "Now that the whipped cream is polished off, shake the remaining sprinkles on the cake. Unless Little Helper ate them, too. Now you can sit down and enjoy your Harvest Pumpkin Pie Cheesecake (Parent Version). Oh yes, don't forget to laminate this page to avoid more impromptu experimentation in the future. About The Author The author is David Leonhardt. Sign up for his weekly satire column up at http://TheHappyGuy.com/positive-thinking-free-ezine.html or read more columns at http://TheHappyGuy.com
MORE RESOURCES:
Google News |
|
|
|
RELATED ARTICLES
Chicken Adobo This particular recipe is Phillipian. Here are the ingredients you need to make a meal for 2:4-6 Chicken Thighs3 cups of Vinegar3 cups of Soy SaucePinch of Garlic (Optional)Rice (I use Uncle Ben's Instant Rice)Warning: You can get very sick if you don't cook Poultry for at least one hour!!Directions:1. My Mothers Recipe Box Remember the days when cookbooks weren't so readily available, and you or your mother relied on only one or two different cookbooks for cooking all of your family's meals? I still have my mother's old cookbooks, as well as my grandmother's. Each one is worn from age and use--if you flip through the tattered pages it is obvious which recipes were turned to time and time again. Weight Loss Recipe: Spicy Chicken Cacciatore Just because you are watching your weight, doesn't mean the whole family can't enjoy your health enhancing meals! The kids will love "Spicy Chicken Cacciatore" and you will love it because it is so low in calories and fat!Long term weight loss isn't about hunger, misery and crash dieting. It's a whole new way of learning to prepare nutritious food that your body needs and enjoys. Low-Carb Pastry Pizzazz This delicious treat adds only 1.9 grams of carb for a Superb Roll of any size. How to Make Your Own Low Fat Vanilla Ice Cream Sometimes, when you have set yourself in the weight loss journey, you may miss your old friends: snacks.But life does not have to be miserable for you to lose weight. Straight Talk from a Comfort Foodie - Simpler Times When it was unfolding, I never thought I lived in "simpler times". That would have described pioneer days, or the world prior to the industrial revolution. Main Dish Zucchini Recipes With summer coming to an end, you probably have an overabundanceof zucchini from your garden that you are trying to find recipesfor. Or maybe you know someone who is trying to find homes forall of their excess zucchini! You'd be amazed at all the mealsyou can create with zucchini. So, You Have A Crockpot - Now Youll Want Crockpot Recipes To those of us that don't know, crockpot recipes are among the best out there! Did you receive a crockpot as a gift at your wedding shower or perhaps as a birthday gift and have no idea how to use it? Crockpots are great kitchen tools that offer a convenience like none other. Many meals from basic chicken recipes to fancy Christmas recipes can be made in the crock pot. How to Make a Tantalizing White Lightening Chili Chili cooks always want to discover that award-winning chili recipe that will be tantalizing for their family and friends and maybe even impress a few chili contest judges. Wouldn't it be exciting to UNLEASH your chili and rock your family and friends' worlds, save money and have a great time preparing it?In my interviews with outstanding chili cooks, I have developed some tantalizing chili recipes that are easy, time and money saving and make your body tingle from the first taste right down to your toes. Fun & Fruity Recipes Sometimes the easiest way to get children to eat healthy is to let them have a hand in making their own snacks?and add whipped cream on top. Here are two fruity recipes that are fun and easy to make, and even more fun to eat. Italian Recipes - Top 3 Dinner Recipes That You Should Prepare Tonight! If you are wondering what to prepare for dinner tonight, then you can always try these easy recipes. It's quick and affordable. Toasted Spiced Walnuts You can trust me that I make sure to take care to have as EnergyRich? a vacation as possible (why come back from vacation feeling bloated, a few pounds heavier, experiencing heartburn etc, right?) and wanted to share one of my favorite recipes to help make that happen!First you need to be ready to .. Bourbon BBQ Sauce If you are seeking a very unique flavored bbq sauce for your next barbeque then you must try bourbon bbq sauce. This is a very unique sauce that only you will know the secret ingredient. Low Carb Recipes Actually Taste Great! Many people are beginning diets that encourage low carb recipes these days. But, what are low carb recipes? What things can and cannot be made into a low carb recipe? Following your diets strict guidelines is important, but using the Internet as a tool will help you. Paella, The Most Famous Spanish Dish First of all, paella is not exactly the dish but the recipient this typical plate is cooked in. We all have seen the paella pan before when visiting Spain or browsing the net for paella recipesThe typical paella a la valenciana was "invented" in a small village called El Perelló close to the city of Valencia. Making Whoopie! Whoopie Pies that is! Other known as "Moon Cakes"Wicked WhoopiesAmy who loves to bake would have never thought to earn a living baking whoopie pies?! It sounds crazy now, she says because no one else has done such a thing. She loves to bake (even now, four million whoopie pies later. Rockfish Bessie Ingredients 5-6 lbs. Whole Rockfish1 Onion1 Lemon1 LimeCilantroCorn HusksOlive OilSalt and PepperPreheat over to 375F. Homemade BBQ Sauce Recipes What makes great homemade BBQ sauce recipes? Well, it could be the time and love that you put into making this delectable barbeque sauce for your family to enjoy, or it could be the fresh ingredients that you use.The barbecue that you create is what make your meals so tasty and wonderful. Chicken Wings with Oyster Sauce Chicken wings with oyster sauce Servings: 3-4Ingredients:12 chicken wings½ lb. Chinese broccoli1 green onion (sliced to ½" length)1 slice ginger (diced)1 Tablespoon soy sauce½ teaspoon salt½ Tablespoon rice cooking wine Seasoning sauce #11 cup water½ teaspoon salt1 teaspoon sugar1 pinch of Szechuan peppercornSeasoning sauce #22 Tablespoons oyster sauce¼ Tablespoon sesame oil½ Tablespoon cooking oil Cornstarch paste½ Tablespoon cornstarch½ Tablespoon water Directions:Cut the chicken wings in halves at the joint to make 24 pieces. Strawberry Rhubarb Coffee Cake Bottom Layer:1/2 cup butter or margarine1 cup sugar2 cups flour1/2 teaspoon salt1 teaspoon baking powder1/4 cup milk2 eggs1 teaspoon vanillaCream shortening and sugar. Beat in eggs and stir in milk.
|
 |
 |
||||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
|
|
|||||
| Pendle Writers .com © 2006 | |||||
